mostly benign hatred

i want your microwave mac & cheese to be too hot and burn your tongue right in the middle so that it feels rubbery the next day.

i want the heels of your shoes to snap and i want you fall over in front of everyone.

i want you to burn yourself when you try to pull out the creepy crawler tray.

i want you to fart in front your childhood hero and i want them to not be okay with it.